Matrimony
Long before governments and societies ever discussed marriage, God put on the human heart a longing for the unique lifelong commitment and total self-giving love found in the sacrament of matrimony. In your marriage preparation process you will see how marriage corresponds to this human desire for a lasting love and how it’s also good for your happiness and for the a flourishing society.
However, even more importantly you will see how marriage is bound up with God’s plan for the entire world.
There is also a practical side. You will get a chance to examine the most pressing concerns of marriage, from dealing with conflict to fostering intimacy. Using the tools of Scripture and the church teachings, you will craft for yourselves a sturdy, Christ- centered relationship, designed to whether life’s storms and to draw each other deeper into God’s love.
Wedding Guidelines
We extend to you our best wishes on your forthcoming wedding.
The following guidelines are intended to help you plan your wedding here at St. John’s. Should you have any questions, please call the rectory office at 732-8521. The rectory is open Monday through Thursday, from 9:00 a.m. until 4:00 p.m. We are happy to be of assistance to you.
Marriage Preparation Day
All couples attend a marriage preparation session sponsored by the diocese (Pre-Cana). A registration form is enclosed with these guidelines. This required session (which will be attended by a number of couples) is in addition to the required meetings with the pastor.
Music
An appointment to see the parish music director/organist should be scheduled at least three months prior to the wedding. The music selected should be appropriate for a Catholic wedding, conform to the norms of Catholic liturgy and be selected by bride, groom and Music Director – Karen Pohorecki – please call the rectory for her number 732-8521 (See the paragraph below marked with an asterisk under “remunerations”.)
Remunerations
A deposit of $100.00 must be made within 10 days of the request for the date and time of the wedding. This deposit will be applied to your Church Offering. If no deposit is received, we will release the date and time of the wedding.
Church Offering . .$250.00 (parishioners) or $350 (non-parishioners)
Outside Clergy $100.00 (any clergy outside of St. John’s; family members excluded)
Parish Organist . . . .$150.00
Parish Organist . . . .$ 50.00 (for each rehearsal if utilizing outside soloist)
Parish Organist . . . .$150.00 (if utilizing outside organist our organist must still be paid
Parish Organist . . . .$150.00 (if utilizing outside music group, organist must still be paidParish Parish Soloist . . . . . $ 75.00
Please note: There is no stipend charge for St. John’s clergy to perform your wedding ceremony. Couples may choose to extend a gift to the clergy performing their wedding but that is not part of the required remunerations. Guest organists and soloists (except for close relatives) are not encouraged; however, should the couple choose a guest organist, the parish music director/organist must be notified immediately and receive the full stipend. Pre-recorded music, except in the case of a prelude, is not permitted.
Marriage License
The marriage license may be obtained from any town or clerk in New York State and is good for approximately 2 months. Please bring the license to the rehearsal.
Readings
The selections for the readings and prayers of the wedding liturgy can be found in the Together for Life booklet which will be given to the couple by the pastor. The tear-out sheet in the back of the booklet should be completed and returned to the pastor.
Rehearsal
The rehearsal will be scheduled at a meeting with the pastor. It is very important that the bride and groom and all others taking an active role in the wedding be prompt for the rehearsal and the wedding. The rehearsal usually lasts 45 minutes to an hour.
At this time, the remainder of the church offering and the offering for the organist is due. Checks may be payable to St. John the Evangelist Church for the church offering and a separate check is made directly to the organist.
Flowers
The bride provides all floral arrangements which may be taken to the reception or left at the church after the wedding. Brides being married on the same day at St. John’s may wish to share floral expenses.
Photographs
Still photography and videography taken by professional photographers are permitted during the wedding. Photographers are asked to be discreet. Reverence for the liturgy and the sanctuary should be shown at all times.
Photographs of the wedding party and family may be taken after the wedding, provided that reverence for the sanctuary is shown, and as long as the scheduled beginning of the next church service or event is not impeded. Photographers may not enter the sanctuary during the ceremony.
Birdseed, rice, confetti & flower petals
The tossing of birdseed, rice, confetti or flower petals, outside or inside the church, is not permitted.
Runner
Because of the tripping hazard and related insurance issues, a runner is not permitted.
From the Handbook of American Guild of Organists (AGO)
Please note this section of the AGO Code of Ethics. No AGO member may play services in any church where he or she is not organist without first following very specific guidelines. Here is the exact statement:
RULE 4. Before accepting an engagement for a wedding, funeral or other service, members shall obtain the approval of the incumbent musician. In cases where this engagement has been requested by a third party, it is appropriate for the third party to offer the incumbent his/her customary fee. It is the responsibility of members to inform the third party of this rule.
P.S. It is important that the priest meet with the person who provides the music for the church wedding as soon as possible and to obtain from her/him at that time, a program of the musical selections for our files. Thank you!
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